"There is over 100,000 miles of blood vessels in the human body. That's
enough to stretch halfway to the moon. The human heart has to be strong
enough to pump blood through those vessels 24/7. But just know my hearts
also strong enough to love you to the moon and back." -me
So being young is complicated. I am so scared of where I'm going in life. I'm making the bold decision of applying for early enrollment next year, so that i can spend my senior year in in college. I'm scared as hell but i won't let anyone know that. I'm crazy about this guy I'm dating. But i fear for our near future when he graduates.
because the mind is always blooming
Monday, May 14, 2012
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
My interpretation
So everyone has a theory of "the meaning of life"
I guess I never had truly thought about it really. I'v always veiwed life as the longest thing we'll ever do, the present, the future, and even the past. It's just been one of those things I'v never truly cared about because we only get one life so we're supposed to live it right?
Well when this meaning comes to mind it usually is supposed to be some big secret. But i think I guess the answer is kind of there in facts.
The saying "Peace, Love, and Happiness" does kind of sum it up.
We live in a mutual sort of peace with everything around us, or we're supposed to be. We produce carbon dioxide that plants, trees, grass and more take in to make food for themselves. In return they make and put out oxygen which we breath, make fires with to keep us warm, To cook and more. And since, technically being animals, we are also vital to keeping the food chain in balance, weather we're decreasing an overgrown population by using for food or conserving one that is dying. So we need to keep that balance which makes up that "peace" category.
And we're supposed to fall in love, I believe its a natural born right to be fond of someone enough to want to always be around them and procreate. We need to make children to keep that balance. We need to make loving or non-loving human relationships whether it's with our parents, siblings, best friend, teachers, or significant other. By feeling close to someone and being wanted we are happy, and it keeps us sane. We're going to hurt a lot through our lives, but we're also going to love a lot too and it's the one thing we can do to make it through those hard times. For those with no hope for that upside to life I'm sure there is someone or something they truly love, weather its a person, an animal, a materialistic item or just they may even love being alone.
Then Happiness is something that must be conserved and cherished. It's the hope we have in hard situations. When things are rough we want it, we need it. When your upset it's easy to lose any optimism that you have. I find that wallowing in misery will only make you worse, its hard to think positive when things are so bad but you realize when things look up again you were silly to think all the bad would last forever. Anything can happen. We are just a speck of dust in the giant eye of the universe. We're shifting and every day will change something. We become wiser and older with each moment and one day we will die, but not without experiencing the beauty of what the world can bring.
I guess I never had truly thought about it really. I'v always veiwed life as the longest thing we'll ever do, the present, the future, and even the past. It's just been one of those things I'v never truly cared about because we only get one life so we're supposed to live it right?
Well when this meaning comes to mind it usually is supposed to be some big secret. But i think I guess the answer is kind of there in facts.
The saying "Peace, Love, and Happiness" does kind of sum it up.
We live in a mutual sort of peace with everything around us, or we're supposed to be. We produce carbon dioxide that plants, trees, grass and more take in to make food for themselves. In return they make and put out oxygen which we breath, make fires with to keep us warm, To cook and more. And since, technically being animals, we are also vital to keeping the food chain in balance, weather we're decreasing an overgrown population by using for food or conserving one that is dying. So we need to keep that balance which makes up that "peace" category.
And we're supposed to fall in love, I believe its a natural born right to be fond of someone enough to want to always be around them and procreate. We need to make children to keep that balance. We need to make loving or non-loving human relationships whether it's with our parents, siblings, best friend, teachers, or significant other. By feeling close to someone and being wanted we are happy, and it keeps us sane. We're going to hurt a lot through our lives, but we're also going to love a lot too and it's the one thing we can do to make it through those hard times. For those with no hope for that upside to life I'm sure there is someone or something they truly love, weather its a person, an animal, a materialistic item or just they may even love being alone.
Then Happiness is something that must be conserved and cherished. It's the hope we have in hard situations. When things are rough we want it, we need it. When your upset it's easy to lose any optimism that you have. I find that wallowing in misery will only make you worse, its hard to think positive when things are so bad but you realize when things look up again you were silly to think all the bad would last forever. Anything can happen. We are just a speck of dust in the giant eye of the universe. We're shifting and every day will change something. We become wiser and older with each moment and one day we will die, but not without experiencing the beauty of what the world can bring.
Monday, January 23, 2012
Been A while
I hope i hope I am not losing my writing motivation.
Life is progressing, in a positive way! Recently I was left with anxiety and fear of being hurt with my last relationship. My current Boyfriend must be driven crazy by my constant accusations. But It's surely not something I am able to help. It's hard to trust anyone really nowadays, all the cheating and lying and hiding had made me realize how real the world really is. My father has been gone every night and things have been a little rough, but I'v been going to counseling to help me through this all. I always told myself I didn't need it but I'v found it as sort of a push and help to improve my lifestyle.
Though above all the constant nonsense my goals and priorities are still in place and I am still striving and working hard to reach them.
I'v got the good grades, the great relationship, a decent paying job, I'm nearly half done with my drivers education and learning to drive now and then all I have to do is wait to see where that takes me next. Things are starting to fall on the right track and I feel like the venting to my unread blog can stop.
I really adore the guy I am dating, I can't say we've ever fought, just the occasional need of reassurance I need from him on occasion. He is so talented and sometimes I hardly believe there's much for me to do to impress him, but I'm still trying to find ways to.
I'm constantly trying to find what I want to do with the rest of my life. Although when I do find what that is I know that's when i really need to work hard at achieving and maybe that will impress him, Especially if this "love" is what we say it is and we make it far enough for me to show him. I don't only want to just impress my boyfriend though but my dad too. He is hardly around now that he's love-struck and off with his new girlfriend all the time. I do everything in my power to grab his attention and show him what I'm capable of. I think as a 16 year old girl he underestimates how hard I can work and the range of feelings and emotions I can possess. I believe though if i work hard and not mess up I can really Go where I want and when I manage to become successful and happy that will really make him happy.
Life is progressing, in a positive way! Recently I was left with anxiety and fear of being hurt with my last relationship. My current Boyfriend must be driven crazy by my constant accusations. But It's surely not something I am able to help. It's hard to trust anyone really nowadays, all the cheating and lying and hiding had made me realize how real the world really is. My father has been gone every night and things have been a little rough, but I'v been going to counseling to help me through this all. I always told myself I didn't need it but I'v found it as sort of a push and help to improve my lifestyle.
Though above all the constant nonsense my goals and priorities are still in place and I am still striving and working hard to reach them.
I'v got the good grades, the great relationship, a decent paying job, I'm nearly half done with my drivers education and learning to drive now and then all I have to do is wait to see where that takes me next. Things are starting to fall on the right track and I feel like the venting to my unread blog can stop.
I really adore the guy I am dating, I can't say we've ever fought, just the occasional need of reassurance I need from him on occasion. He is so talented and sometimes I hardly believe there's much for me to do to impress him, but I'm still trying to find ways to.
I'm constantly trying to find what I want to do with the rest of my life. Although when I do find what that is I know that's when i really need to work hard at achieving and maybe that will impress him, Especially if this "love" is what we say it is and we make it far enough for me to show him. I don't only want to just impress my boyfriend though but my dad too. He is hardly around now that he's love-struck and off with his new girlfriend all the time. I do everything in my power to grab his attention and show him what I'm capable of. I think as a 16 year old girl he underestimates how hard I can work and the range of feelings and emotions I can possess. I believe though if i work hard and not mess up I can really Go where I want and when I manage to become successful and happy that will really make him happy.
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